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Showing posts from September, 2025

From Westlands High-Rise to Rock Bottom: Bobby’s Raw Lessons on Redefining Success

  I’ll be honest: I was nervous. Not the butterflies-before-a-first-date kind of nervous, but the sweaty-palms-what-if-this-goes-wrong kind of nervous. And no, it wasn’t the elite police officers stationed outside Westgate Mall that made me feel that way. These guys looked like extras from an action movie, stone-faced, guns holstered but itching for action—the kind who could arrest you just for blinking suspiciously. But my anxiety wasn’t about them. It was about the coffee date that awaited me. I was about to meet Bobby. Now, Bobby wasn’t some old buddy or long-lost cousin. He was a stranger plucked from the infamous Founders Battlefield WhatsApp group. If you’ve never had the pleasure, or trauma, of being in that group, let me paint a picture. Imagine a gladiator pit where the weapons are business theories, startup jargon , and the occasional philosophical grenade. It’s the kind of place where founders duel with “ synergies ” and “ scalability ,” and you risk being verbally...

Why You Struggle with Making Decisions: Lessons from Moses on Simplicity, Trust, and Intentionality

There are moments in life when a story grips you—not because it is new, but because it mirrors the journey you’re on. Listening to Moses Ng’ang’a speak at our men’s gathering, I felt such a moment. His words about living by values— simplicity, trust, and radical intentionality —were not abstract theories. They were lived realities, tested through fire, and refined into wisdom. His story reminded me of the biblical Moses . The young, brash prince who thought he was destined to save his people by force, only to flee into the wilderness when his pride led him astray. It took forty years of tending sheep, silence, and humility before he was ready to return and fulfill his mission. The parallel was unmistakable: transformation requires stripping away pride, embracing simplicity, and grounding oneself in values that outlast circumstances. In today’s fast-moving world—where instant gratification is glorified and choices are endless— Moses Ng’ang’a ’s life offers a powerful blueprint. What...

“Trust the Process.” How Small Daily Habits Build Unshakable Self-Trust

I’ve heard these three words countless times in conversations; in coaching sessions, in boardrooms, in late-night chats with friends. They’re usually meant to comfort or encourage, but for the longest time, they annoyed me. What does it even mean to trust the process when you’re knee-deep in frustration, when you’ve set goals and failed, or when progress feels invisible? I didn’t understand it — not really — until my own life forced me to. See, for years, I lived like results were everything. I believed the only proof of success was the finish line: the marathon medal , the published book, the thriving business. And because I measured myself only by the outcome, I worked relentlessly. I sacrificed rest, joy, even relationships, thinking that if I just pushed harder, I’d finally arrive. But instead of joy, I found myself living in constant tension. I was exhausted, running on fumes, and yet… not fulfilled. That’s when I realized: I didn’t trust myself, and without self-trust , the...

From Weakling to Warrior: What Swallowed Star Teaches About Habits and Growth

 I am about to reveal a secret. Lean in. I watch anime , unashamedly. Not just any anime, but cultivation anime . Stories where a weak and overlooked character rises against all odds, pushed by social pressure, failure, and rejection, until they become stronger than anyone believed possible. My favorite is the Chinese donghua Swallowed Star . Its hero, Luo Feng , begins as a poor boy with a disabled brother and loving but struggling parents. He dreams of becoming a warrior, not for fame, but to care for his family and give back to his community. What fascinates me most is not the monsters he fights or the galaxies he conquers, but the habits and mindset that transform him from an ordinary boy into a legend. His story holds three powerful lessons for all of us who are striving to grow, build habits, and live with intention. Lesson 1 -  Your Purpose Fuels Your Discipline Luo Feng’s earliest purpose was simple: to protect his family. That clarity pushed him to train har...

How to Truly Communicate: Mastering the 5 Habits That Strengthen Love and Trust

 I've always wondered what it really means to communicate. Some say it’s in the words, and they will hold you to every sentence. Yet when you look at politicians, they slip through words like water through fingers; today they say one thing, tomorrow the opposite, and somehow they are never bound. Others swear that communication is in body language; the tilt of a head, the tightening of lips, or the way someone avoids eye contact. They’ll say, “Forget their words, look at how they move, the truth is there.” But is that all communication is? Words and gestures? I believe it’s more complex. Communication isn’t just about the message sent, but about the worlds colliding when two people interact. Once words are spoken, they create ripple effects, shaping how the other responds. Sometimes, it’s not the sentence that matters but the storm it stirs in the listener’s heart. Think about this: a girlfriend demands a gift. The boyfriend, trying to avoid conflict, caves in and buys it. ...

How to Truly Learn to Love: Beyond Emotional Needs and Into Lasting Connection

Love is one of the most misunderstood words in our vocabulary. Many people believe being loved is the same as having their emotional needs met—feeling safe, accepted, valued, or supported. But if that’s all love is, then a boss praising your work or a partner buying you gifts would count as “love.” We know instinctively that’s not enough. The real question is: How do we learn to love—not just receive it, but practice it deeply? Recently, a woman told me, “I don’t think I’ll ever find someone who truly loves me for me.” When I asked if she loved herself, she paused and admitted, “I don’t know.” That moment revealed what many of us struggle with: confusing emotional needs with love, and overlooking the practice of loving ourselves first. Let’s break this down into three truths about love—and how we can begin practicing it in our daily lives. 1. Love Requires Imagination Beyond Our Wounds Our understanding of love is often limited by past pain. If a relationship fails, we a...

The Hidden Power of Celibacy: Healing, Freedom, and Purpose

 In a world where sexual expression is sold on every billboard, whispered in every song, and promoted as the ultimate badge of freedom, the idea of celibacy almost sounds absurd. Why would anyone intentionally choose abstinence , especially later in life? Isn’t that old-fashioned, restrictive, even irrelevant? And yet, I’ve discovered something remarkable. For some, celibacy isn’t about denial. It’s about clarity. It’s about healing. It’s about reclaiming energy for higher pursuits. What if, instead of viewing celibacy as a loss, we saw it as one of the most radical acts of self-mastery available to us today? I want to explore this question with you, not as a religious doctrine or rigid rule, but as an invitation to rethink love, relationships, and purpose. Along the way, I’ll share stories, values, and research that reveal why pressing pause might just give us more freedom, not less.   1.        Celibacy as a Path to Clarity and Healing ...

The Five Pits That Keep Men Weak (And How to Build True Masculine Strength)

What does it really mean to be a strong man? That question might sound simple at first, but if you sit with it for even a minute, it gets complicated. For generations, men were told that strength meant power, dominance, and control. Be louder. Be tougher. Don’t cry. Rule your household. Provide at all costs. That’s what society calls masculinity . Yet, if you look closely, this version of strength often leaves men emotionally broken and relationally empty. On the other hand, we’re seeing another extreme: men who withdraw, avoid responsibility, and base their self-worth entirely on approval from others. Men who people-please , compromise their values to fit in, and cling to affection as if it were oxygen. Neither extreme produces wholeness. One is toxic. The other is termed tongue in cheek as ‘effeminate’. But here’s the truth: between those two extremes lies a third way—the path of the healthy masculine . And here’s the challenge: most men don’t know how to walk it. ...

From Belief to Conviction: Unlocking the Power of Your Inner Identity

What do you believe in? For most people, the question instantly brings up religion. We say, “I believe in Jesus ,” “I believe in Allah ,” or “I follow the teachings of Buddha .” Faith, of course, is powerful. But belief extends far beyond religion. It weaves into our culture, our habits, our identity, and even the smallest decisions we make each day. Beliefs are the invisible architects of your reality. They filter how you interpret the world, shape how you act, and quietly build the person you become. And yet, here’s the truth many people miss: most of your beliefs aren’t objectively true. They are mental maps; thoughts you’ve repeated until you accept them as reality. That’s not a bad thing. We need beliefs to navigate a complex and sometimes hostile world. But if your beliefs remain unchecked, they can trap you in limitations you didn’t choose. If you learn to examine and reshape them, they can become powerful allies in building the life you want. Let’s explore three t...

Samson vs. David: What Two Ancient Lives Teach Us About Identity, Discipline, and Purpose

Two men. Two callings. Two very different paths. Samson and David are among the most well-known figures in the Bible , yet their lives couldn't have been more different. God chose both for greatness, but how they responded to their gifts shaped their legacies. Samson was celebrated even before his birth. His parents received direct instructions from an angel on how to raise him: what he should eat, how he should live, and the vows he should keep. He was destined to become a national hero, a man of supernatural strength. But instead of acting mature, Samson indulged in rebellion, pursuing his desires recklessly until his downfall. David’s story starts in the shadows. Many scholars believe that passages like Psalm 51 and Psalm 69 suggest David was raised feeling stigmatized, rejected, and possibly even seen as illegitimate. He was the overlooked son, left to fend for himself against lions and bears in the wilderness. Yet, from this place of obscurity and rejection, David’s longi...