Think back to your teenage years. Awkward growth spurts. Voice cracks. That strange sense of not fully belonging in your own skin. For many of us, those years were some of the most uncomfortable—yet they were also years of tremendous growth.
Growth is at the heart of what it means to be alive. You’re
either moving forward or slowly shrinking back. And yet, somewhere along the
way, society sold us the idea of “slowing down”—retirement, coasting, waiting
it out. Too many men step back, and before long, their energy, health, and even
their sense of purpose fade away.
But here’s the truth: life doesn’t reward talent alone.
Life rewards grit.
I was reminded of this at one of our men’s gatherings, where
Joe Mwangi, a speaker with stories as real as scars, broke down grit in a way
that stuck with me. He unpacked it as an acronym—G.R.I.T.: Growth,
Resilience, Initiative, Truth.
This wasn’t a motivational poster moment. It was a
challenge: if you want to build lasting habits and live with impact, grit
isn’t optional—it’s essential.
Let me break it down.
Growth: Turning Failure Into Fuel
Joe started with the Growth Mindset — the idea
popularized by psychologist Carol Dweck that our abilities aren’t fixed. They
can be developed through effort, learning, and perseverance.
He told us about his many failures, each one loud and
painful. I could feel the room shift. Every man there had tasted that
bitterness: the deal that fell through, the exam we bombed, the business that
never took off. Failure has a way of sticking in the gut.
Most of us, when we fail, take it personally. We spiral into
shame or self-doubt. But the question isn’t whether you fail—it’s what you
do next.
Do you give up? Or do you ask, "What went wrong?" "How can I
improve?" "Who can help me see what I can’t see?"
That shift—from defeat to curiosity—is what growth looks like. It’s messy. It’s humbling. It requires mentors, coaches, and teammates who can spot our blind spots. But it’s the only way forward.
Takeaway: If you want better habits, don’t avoid failure—dissect it. Use it as raw material to grow.
Resilience: Rising Slowly but Surely
Then came Resilience.
Joe asked, “Have you ever gone through something so
painful that just thinking about it makes your head ache?” Every man
nodded. We’ve all been there. Loss. Betrayal. Financial collapse.
Our instinct is fight, flight, or freeze. Too often, we
freeze. We shut down. And when we do try to “bounce back,” we often do it from
pride—rushing, forcing, pretending we’re okay.
But real resilience isn’t speed. It’s patience. It’s
allowing yourself to feel the emotions—fear, anger, grief—without letting
them define you. It’s taking time to rest, process, and then, step by step,
choose not to stay down.
Adversity, Joe reminded us, is not the enemy. It’s the teacher. It chisels us into stronger, sharper men.
Takeaway: Don’t despise adversity. Sit with it, learn from it, and rise—not in haste, but in strength.
Initiative: Stepping Up When It’s Hardest
Next, Joe moved to Initiative.
In hard times, many of us withdraw. We stop showing up. But
growth demands the opposite. When you take initiative, you stop waiting for
perfect conditions and start moving forward—even clumsily.
Think of the man trying to sell his product. No one’s
buying. He feels like a failure. Most would retreat. But the man with grit
asks, "What’s not working?" "Is my pitch off?" "Is my product too generic?" "Am I
not engaging enough?"
Feedback, though it stings, is gold. It’s not a personal attack. It’s a mirror. Initiative is having the courage to look in that mirror and act.
Takeaway: Don’t fear feedback. Use it. Take initiative by owning your role in the process and making the changes needed to move forward.
Truth: Living Aligned With Who You Are
Finally, Joe brought it home with Truth.
Being true to yourself is harder than it sounds. Too often,
we live to please, to fit in, to chase trends. We drown in noise and
distraction.
But being true to yourself requires reflection. It means
shutting down the screens, sitting with a notebook, and asking, "What do I
truly value?" "What kind of man do I want to be?" "What legacy do I want to leave?"
When you know your truth, grit becomes possible. You’ll endure more, dare more, and keep going when others quit—because you’re aligned with something deeper than applause.
Takeaway: Clarity about your values gives you staying power. Know yourself, and you’ll find the grit to keep moving forward.
Call to Action
Talent is a gift, but grit is a choice. It’s the stubborn
strength to keep showing up — in your growth, your resilience, your initiative,
and your truth.
The men who build lasting habits, meaningful lives, and
enduring impact aren’t the most gifted. They’re the most committed.
So here’s my challenge to you: This week, pick one letter
of G.R.I.T. to focus on.
- Reflect
on a failure and find the growth lesson.
- Take
one small resilient step after a setback.
- Ask
for feedback and act on it.
- Switch
off the noise and write down your values.
Do this, and you’ll not only build better habits—you’ll
build a stronger, truer, grittier version of yourself.
Because in the end, grit isn’t just about surviving. It’s
about becoming.
Thank you for taking the time to read this blog! I'm Edwin Moindi, a Life and Habit Coach dedicated to helping people understand their habits, navigate their emotions, and cultivate emotional intelligence for a happier, more balanced life. I'd love to hear your thoughts—feel free to reach out and share your insights or questions!
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